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    Children who are separated from the abuser are in the process of grieving over the loss.Children may also grieve over losing the lifestyle and positive image of the abuser they had before the violence began.

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    You have to make sure you're serious and your partner is serious before you bring the kiddos into the mix.Overnight, I was thrown into a brave, new world -- one that involved a tween.I scoured the Internet for advice about dating people with kids. I got the same advice from multiple people: "Be yourself." OK, what next? We were on and off, and it wasn't the healthiest relationship I've ever been in.You find yourself making excuses for him, rationalizing his poor choices, and working to see things from his perspective more than your own.When people do not fully grow up, they farm out the hard work of adulthood to those closest to them.

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